Point of View

I'm still laughing about something that happened at lunch today.  I called Jim to see if he wanted to go eat a bite somewhere.  He said yes, of course, so I went to pick him up.


I was reading some Facebook posts while I was sitting in the car waiting for him and ran across the funniest short story ever.  In fact, I think I was still laughing about it when Jim got in the car.  So I read it to him when we got to the restaurant.   Here's the short story.


Man driving down road.
Woman driving up same road.
They pass each other.

Woman yells out the window, PIG!

Man yells out window, WITCH!

Man rounds next curve.

Man crashes into a HUGE PIG in the middle of road.




Thought for the Day:
If men would just listen!!!




I thought it was so funny, maybe because it's so true.  haha  Anyway, then Jim pulls out his phone and proceeds to read  a story that one of  his friends posted on Facebook.  Here's what it said:


A man was sitting on the edge of the bed watching his wife who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off, he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday. "I'd like to be 8 again," she replied, still looking in the mirror.


On the morning of her birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of cocoa puffs and then took her to Adventure World theme park. What a day. He put her on every ride in the park. The Death Slide. The Wall of Fear. The Screaming Roller Coaster.....everything there was.


Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. He then took her to McDonalds where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake. Then it was off to a movie. Popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy--M&Ms. What a fabulous adventure!!


Finally, she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed, exhausted. He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being 8 again?" Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. "I meant my dress size, you doe-doe."


The moral of the story: even when a man is listening, he is going to get it wrong.


Jim thought he had the last laugh, and maybe he did.  I've been laughing about the whole thing all afternoon.  Why is it that men and women have such different points of view?  I think someone wrote a book about that very thing, if I'm not mistaken!

My Daddy

Daddy died one year ago. It's still hard to comprehend that he's gone from this earth. I know without a doubt that he's in a much better place and is much happier now than he was the last few years of his life. Those last couple years were hard for us to watch, but I'm sure were much harder for him. Daddy was always one to be busy.  He could do anything with his hands. He could build a house, make repairs, haul rocks, build porch stairs, lay down decking, help me with my math problems, play ball, ...you name it, he could do it. I miss having him around. I loved his chuckle and his quiet wit. He could make us all laugh without saying much at all. He could just look at me when I was a kid and I knew I better straighten up my act. He was amazing and I miss him.  I look forward to the day when I can see him again. I know the rest of my family feels the same way. It will be a great reunion someday.

The day he died, we left Arizona and drove like crazy to get to Texas. But we were too late. We didn't get there before he passed.  They had taken him to the hospital because he wasn't doing well at all. Mother fully expected that he would return the next day, but he didn't.  Gary and Jim and I had to sit down with Mother and tell her that Daddy wasn't coming back. that he had passed away. The look on her face was so sad. I'll never forget it. Her companion of 63 years was gone. They did everything together. That night I went to the assisted living place to help her get into bed. I was straightening up her bedroom and she looked at me and said, "Now don't move any of your daddy's things. I want him to be able to find his stuff when he gets back."  Wow.  I looked at her and said, "Mother, Daddy's not coming back."  She sat down on the edge of her bed like someone had knocked the air out of her.  I sat down beside her and put my arm around her.  I told her that Daddy was much better off and that he wasn't in any more pain. I told her that he wasn't alone, but had probably been greeted by some of his long lost family members on the other side.  She said, "Do you really think so?"  I told her I did.  That seemed to comfort her but wow, it was hard to be the strong one. I'm usually the one that's a wreck. Somehow I think the Spirit guided me and helped me know what to say.  Up to very recent times in my life, my mother had always been the strong one, the one to try to uplift ME when things weren't going like I wanted them to. I'm still not sure I'm ready to be the brave one, the strong one, the comforter, advice giver, and matriarch.  Ready or not, I guess I'll have to. 

There's an old country song that reminds me of my Daddy. I love the words and thought I'd share the lyrics to Daddy's Hands.

I remember Daddy´s hands, folded silently in prayer.
And reaching out to hold me, when I had a nightmare.
You could read quite a story, in the callouses and lines.
Years of work and worry had left their mark behind.

I remember Daddy´s hands, how they held my Mama tight,
And patted my back, for something done right.
There are things that I´ve forgotten, that I loved about the man,
But I´ll always remember the love in Daddy´s hands.

I remember Daddy´s hands, working 'til they bled.
Sacrificed unselfishly, just to keep us all fed.
If I could do things over, I´d live my life again.
And never take for granted the love in Daddy´s hands.

Daddy's hands were soft and kind when I was cryin´.
Daddy´s hands, were hard as steel when I´d done wrong.
Daddy´s hands, weren´t always gentle
But I´ve come to understand.
There was always love in Daddy´s hands.

There was always love .....In Daddy´s hands.

I LOVE YOU DADDY AND I MISS YOU SO MUCH! I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO THE DAY WHEN WE CAN BE TOGETHER AGAIN! TAKE CARE OF MAMA FOR US!
Love Your daughter, Tamra

My life as a mother-in-law

I have two sons-in-law. They are pretty good guys, if I do say so myself. At least I feel that way about THEM, I'm really beginning to wonder what they actually think about me. 

This weekend, we were in the valley visiting Danica for her upcoming birthday.  We decided to do some shopping and I found myself in the Apple store. I've been wanting an iPhone for quite a while. So after months of trying to talk myself out of it, I finally relented and got one. It's SO COOL!  I really like it.  Of course, there is a huge learning curve for me to learn all the apps and figure out how the things works.  I'm pretty sure my kids and in-law kids think I'm a techno-idiot.  They are probably pretty much right.  haha 

Anyway, the guy in the store helped me set everything up but he couldn't get my email set up so that my phone would receive it.  He said I was probably putting in the wrong password.  I was 99.9% sure I had the right password, but we left the store, without my email working.

So we drove from there to Walmart to pick up a few things.  Jim and Danica ran in the store while Cody and I sat in the car waiting with the kids.  They were gone for quite a while and I was in the very back seat working on my phone trying to figure out what the problem was with my email.  I finally figured it out!  All on my own, I might add.  I was so excited.  Here's the exchange between Cody and me:

ME:  My e-mail! I got it!!!

Cody:  ...silence from the front seat.

ME:  I got it!!!!!!!!!   (slightly louder)

Cody: .....silence again from the front seat.  Absolutely nothing. zip. zilch. nada.

ME:  I GOT  IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  (LOUDER AND WITH MUCH MORE EXPRESSION!)

Cody:  Well............................, I'm just as surprised as you are!!!!

Thank.you.Cody Claridge. for your enthusiasm and support!  Of course, I'm still laughing at his reaction.  I don't know why my sons-in-law think I'm a sitting duck for their jokes. They are very lucky that I am so easy going.  haha  Cody, you can thank me for this picture next time I see you, by the way!!!!

Actually I probably laugh at myself probably more than they do!  Check out this post from 2009 about Trace.

http://jimandtamrareidhead.blogspot.com/2009/05/son-in-law.html

Don't be jealous now!  I LOVE my two sons-in-law!!!

To blog or not to blog?

I'm trying to decide whether I should continue with my blog. I originally started it for my mom so that she could see pictures of the family and all our comings and goings. She loved it up until the last year and a half or so, but now that she's gone, I've kind of lost interest.  I guess it's a good thing to do for family history, but Facebook really is much easier. I don't even know if anyone really reads the old blog. If I keep doing it, I guess it's mainly for me. It's definitely fun to go back and look at my old posts and see how everyone has changed, especially the kids and grandkids. Time will tell....

What Will Matter

I read this poem at my mother's funeral. It's my mother to a "T." So I thought I would share it.

What Will Matter
By Michael Josephson

Ready or not, some day it will all come to an end.
There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours, or days.
All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten, will pass to someone else.
Your wealth, fame, and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance.
It will not matter what you owned or what you were owed.
Your grudges, resentments, frustrations, and jealousies will finally disappear.
So too, your hopes, ambitions, plans, and to-do lists will expire.
The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.
It won’t matter where you came from or what side of the tracks you lived on at the end.
It won’t matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.
Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.

So what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured?

What will matter is not what you bought but what you built,
not what you got, but what you gave.
What will matter is not your success, but your significance.
What will matter is not what you learned, but what you taught.
What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage, or sacrifice that enriched,
empowered, or encouraged others to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence but your character.
What will matter is not how many people you knew,
but how many will feel a lasting loss when you’re gone.
What will matter is not your memories, but the memories of those who loved you.
What will matter is how long you will be remembered, by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters doesn’t happen by accident.
It’s not a matter of circumstance but of choice.
Choose to live a life that matters.

Mother's funeral

The day I've always dreaded happened. My mother, Neva Dorothy Gaines, passed away on Tuesday, October 4, 2011. Sad day for this old girl. I learned so much from my mother and am so thankful to have had her in my life. The funeral service was very special. All 3 of us kids spoke. A special group of young men from Permian High School Black Magic sang and all the grandkids sang a song as well. It was so meaningful and I'm sure that Mother would have been proud of all of us and would have liked the service we planned.

Here are a few pictures I took over the weekend.

My mother's hands. She was a hard working woman for sure. Never sat still for very long up until the last couple of years.

Her casket and flowers were beautiful. I think she would have been pleased.

Rustin and Little Dorothy, my mom's namesake. She's a cutie and about as spunky as my mom was. She was sucking her thumb in this picture, so Rustin pulled it out of her mouth. You can see her reaction in the next photo. hahaha

My beautiful niece Jenalee holding Danica's baby Brett.

Danica with Debbie Gaines.

Lots of the great grands were there as well. They are all so cute.

Bradley with Avery and Parker Strader.

Dotti and Taralee.

Sharon Gaines (SIL) and Ryan.

Bradley and Rustin.

The kids all gravitate to Ryan. They love him and can't get enough attention from him!

Pall bearers loading the casket in the hearse.

Nicole and Glen Strader with Rustin.

I didn't get all the photos I wanted to take, but I will cherish the ones I did get. The song the grandkids sang "God be With You Till We Meet Again" was amazing and hopefully I can download it so we can hear it again. I will miss my Mother always until I see her again and I know I will!

Permian High School Football

The Gaines families all met in Odessa this past weekend for my mother's funeral. We were there over a Friday, which of course, is high school football night. Permian High School to be exact. So Gary, my brother, got tickets for all of us to go to the game. It was so exciting and also good for the psyche to think about something besides my mother's funeral for a few hours.

Here's Rustin and Kailee Howland (my niece). Notice the braces. Kailee is 14...Rustin is??? well, anyway, they are our brace face kids this year.

Here we are enjoying the game. We all had our black and white on, as did the entire crowd!

Bradley and Rustin.

Some of the girls--and one boy: Danica, Jenalee, Nicole, Bailey, and Jude. Having a great time.

Pa and Dottie

Gene, Dana, and Kailee Howland (Dana is my sister)

Ryan and Sharon (my brother's wife)

Coach Gaines on the sidelines, pacing, like he always does. I love this picture of him.

Run-through banner for the players.

Part of our crew as we were dressed and ready for the game.

BTW, Permian won in a nail biter, 28-26. It went down to the last 9 seconds. Very tense but very enjoyable, especially with a big win. Here's hoping the rest of the season goes just as well!

Fourth of July Rodeo and Parade

I just found that this post I did never published. Let the pictures speak for themselves. Fourth of July...

Valley Trip--another catch-up post

A couple weeks ago, the girl and I took a trip to the valley. We had fun staying in a motel and swimming and trying to stay cool in the "valley of the sun." --which was no problem as long as we were in a swim suit and had a large Sonic drink in hand. ;o)

Here's Miss Dotti looking as cute as ever.

Handsome Mr. Cole Man. He's so cute. He had never stayed in a hotel and walked into the room looking around as if he had no idea why he was there!

Taralee and Brody. He's a water baby if I ever saw one. Actually, all three of these kids are waterbabies. They loved swimming, every minute of it.

We found a fun splash pad in downtown Phoenix and the kids ran through it fully clothed. It felt so good to them. It was really funny watching them try to jump the water spouts and judge when they might get sprayed.

Cole was just happy as a lark.

Dotti loved the water and didn't mind getting wet at all either. In fact, she loved it.

It was a fun trip with just us girls. We didn't get any time to go shopping though. Some day we'll do that when we have NO kids with us. It's too hard to shop with kids this age, at least with the boys. They just want to play hide-n-seek in the clothes racks. haha I'm thinking that someday Dotti will be quite a little shopper though. Time will tell. The only picture I got of Danica was the last one where you can see her legs. Sorry Danica! I love my girls and my grandkids. We need to plan another trip already!

First.Up...Catch up on Rustin's graduation and NY trip

We went to NYC the end of May for Rustin's graduation from NYU College of Dentistry. Of course, this was probably our last trip there so we went to a few of our favorite places that we've seen on previous trips. We went up to the top of the Empire State Bldg. The sites and view from the top are amazing. The very best is the view of the Statue of Liberty.

Looking toward the State again and the World Trade Center area.

The former Chryslter building. It's a beautiful building.

On top of the world!

The big day finally came. Rustin's graduation. Doesn't he look handsome? We are so proud of him and his accomplishments. We were so glad to be able to go and witness his big day!

On top of Rustin's rooftop! Yes, I climbed up there in my skirt. haha

His graduation was in the Lincoln Center. It's a beautiful place.

There's Rustin walking down the aisle. Listening to the speakers.

Getting "hooded."

After the big event. Proud group for sure.

My hair was outta control most of the trip. The humidity in NYC and my hair DO NOT get along. haha

Jim caught a pigeon in front of the Museum of Natural History,. Rustin thought it was so gross. But it didn't surprise me. Jim loves his animals!

After the big graduation day, we took a side trip to Palmyra, NY and Philadelphia, PA. It was fun and it was good of Rustin to indulge us this trip. The Palmyra temple was beautiful as was the Sacred Grove and all the Church history sites that we saw. It was special to see the places that so many things that I've read about actually took place.

This is the view looking straight up through the trees in the sacred grove. it just was so beautiful to me. Beautiful and peaceful.

A trail through the Sacred Grove.

The Liberty Bell in Philadelphia. it was so neat to see some of our nation's history.

This picture was taken in the room where our forefathers wrote the U.S. Constitution. The chair you can see is the actual chair that George Washington sat in when the constitution was written. Amazing what those men did for our country, risking their lives for each one of us. We are so blessed to live in this free land. I'm glad I got to see a small part of where our nation was born.